Ay que cosas. La escuela me esta pateando en el trasero pero gacho. Soy perfeccionista entonces es muy dificil no tener buenes marcas. Recibi un zero esta semana y senti muy feo. Lo bueno es que creo que ya decidi lo que quiero hacer con mi vida. Despues de mucho meditar y pensar y batallar he decidido ser biologo y dejar la escuela de medicina atras. Se siente excelente no tener por que preocuparme en mis planes para la futura. Es una tranquilidad exquisita. Ahora me puedo enfocar en lo que realmente quiero, que es ayudar a proteger y entender y estudiar la naturaleza. Todo eso quiero hacer pasando todo el tiempo posible afuera en las montanas y el desierto y sencillamente con madre tierra. Como la amo a ella.
Estoy un poco preocupado por mi esposa. Dice que se siente mal todo el tiempo. Muy debil y cansada y con nauseas. Estoy en el proceso de meter mis papeles para la aseguranza pero se esta tardando por todas las cosas que se tienen que hacer. Solo quiero que este bien y feliz.
Bueno, ya no se que mas puedo decir entonces adelante a salvar al mundo.
Aimee and I went to the movies at the Gateway and saw Sydney White. I freaking love Amanda Bynes and I'm not afraid to admit it.
However, I'm a bit confused about the parking situation at that there mall. Apparently if you spend $20 at Abercrombie you can park for free, but if you spend $20 dollars at the movie theater you have to pay for parking. After the movie we grabbed the little parking validation and headed for the door. When we got to the parking booth to leave, the lady told us it would be a dollar. This is a bit embarrassing perhaps, but we didn't have any cash. I mean no cash whatsoever. There was not a dollar to be found. Hmm. The lady made us sign a paper saying that we would either return within 5 days to pay the dollar or mail a check for $1 in within the same time period. That just seems a little ridiculous to me. I don't know, maybe it doesn't to some other people, but buying a shirt gets me free parking, but not a movie. How strange.
Target still sucks too. They won't take back a broken target brand dvd player that incidentally we had already returned twice before without any problems. It's Target brand. Could I possibly have gotten it anywhere else? Also strange.
On a lighter note, life is good. I always seem to be whining on here, but I don't mean to. I'm happy.
Hmm...what to write.
Life is hard. Sometimes life is really hard. I don't know why. It doesn't seem fair, but everyone always told me that life isn't fair so what was I expecting? It's confusing. There's so many things pulling you in so many directions. At times it seems impossible. My problem, I think, is that I focus too much energy on the wrong things. They aren't bad things, per se, but I'm sure I could save some of that energy and focus it on more important things. Why do we sometimes feel depressed? Maybe not everyone does, but I do at times. There are days when I just feel useless and unimportant like I just simply don't belong.
I'm not very good in social settings. I say dumb things. I am shy. I try too hard. I really don't care what people think of me, but after certain awkward situations I almost always walk away thinking that I could have said or done something different. Will I ever do something the right way so I don't have to think about what I could have done better?
Once again beating a dead horse. Will I ever figure out what I was meant to do with my life? I don't seem to fit anywhere or be competent enough. Hmm. Is there something out that that really has my name stamped on it? Will I know it if I find it? Will it be my passion? I hope so. Introspect sucks.